When you are feeling restless…….

So today marks the 50 day countdown until I graduate from college. I have no idea how four years flew by, it feels like just yesterday I began my first year at Carroll Community College and met some amazing people in the Hill Scholars Program. Now I am about to graduate from the beautiful school that is Hood College.

You always hear the term senioritis, and man is it true. Every day that passes I feel like I am becoming more and more restless. Tonight at my women’s study I was talking to my good friend Naeisha about the mixed feeling about being ready to graduate and be done, but at the same time not ready to move into the real world.

But all I really want to do is leave. My current dream is to work on a cruise ship for a year or two, and I have pretty much applied to every position available. And I sit in my dorm and pray for God to take me away from here and make these days fly by. And anyone who knows me knows that I am a very impatient person.

So most of this semester has been one big lesson from God about being content and patient in where I am at right now. God isn’t working at the pace I tell him to. “The Lord is not not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance” 2 Peter 3:9.

And then I finally had the revelation that God has me here for a reason. He sent me to Hood for a reason, and my job here is not complete. So I have to keep moving forward and finish this race before I can move on to the next journey.

“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’” Jeremiah 29:11. This verse always reassures me because almost every day I freak out about being so restless and worrying about my future, but I have to keep trusting in his timing with everything.

I know I am not the only student who is feeling this way. For me, I have to take everything one day at a time. “Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” Matthew 6:34.

So that is where I am at right now in my life. I know that these last few weeks will fly by, and my whole life will change because a huge journey will have ended. But I know I will always find rest in the arms of my God, and that is the only thing that will help me make it through.

Good luck to everyone with the end of their semester, and have a fantastic Easter weekend! Check out my Good Friday article I wrote last year.

If you need prayer or want to talk more, you can email me at kellieid@aol.com


My friends at Convocation! Jahtay, Ashley, Elaheh, Billy, and I!

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